Ironic Invasions and Muzzies

I was thinking about how much I hate ironic mustaches, or “muzzies” as they’re apparently called by Brits, and felt inspired to share the comic that perfectly demonstrates why ironic muzzies aren’t clever — they just make you look like an asshole. Enter: Hipster Hitler.

If you like hipster jokes, wordplay and/or satire and aren’t easily offended, goosestep on over to HipsterHitler.com.  And yes, the t-shirts are for sale, so you can show your appreciation for german/history/indie rock/web comics/irony  in a single screen printed tee… although I’m not sure wearing them (mainly this one) in public would be such a great idea.

The following comic is my favorite, but mostly because I find extreme closeups hilarious and can use it to torture my German hipster friend who once criticized my resume for being in arial. Apparently his was in garamond because — and i quote — “Harry Potter is in garamond so it will create a positive association.  Plus it just looks way more professional.” *gives judgmental look*

Unfortunately he didn’t find it very funny when I posted this on his Facebook wall… something about wanting to work for the German government some day and it still being “too soon”…. whatever.

For the rest of you, enjoy.

But back to the topic of douchey staches.  This next comic makes me feel like there has to be some connection between crumb catchers and evilness.  That’s why last night I told this mustachioed chap (who Caitlin dubbed Senor Mustache and I later dubbed Burt Reynolds), first that he didn’t look cool, he just looked like the guy on the tube of Pringles. Second, I told him he looked like he was going to teach me how to draw a 3D dinosaur on his PBS show and then molest a child [insert link to a picture of any creepy guy with a mustache].

Now, I don’t mean to suggest something negative about all men with ‘mos. I also told Senor Mustache he looked like my uncle, who happens to have been one of my fav relatives.  However, unlike my uncle, Sr. M is FAR below the age at which a mustache becomes acceptable (I’d say that age is 40, but even then, it’s like c’mon, are you trying to look unattractive?). Thank god Movember is over.

Anyways, I am vehemently anti-facial coif (a little facial fur is okay, so long as it appears accidental or unplanned) because things can get a little *ahem* “hairy” when people subconsciously associate a person with some of history’s biggest creepers, since most of them were rocking the evil dictatorship stache before it was “cool” (fyi: it’s still not cool). Observe:

I think I’ve made my points.  1. Staches are creepy, not ironic. 2. Hipster Hitler is hilarious.